Five years since you left us. I still remember and miss your smile and laughter, although the memory is fading more than I would like. I think of you often mum, I miss you and the conversations we never got to have and the words gone unspoken. I have many regrets and sadness from our relationship and from caring for you and losing you. I think we’d understand each other better now mum, or certainly I think I’d understand you more. I feel I’m more like you now and I appreciate a little more what you’ve been through, how you coped and how we both suffered on the way. I hope you forgive me for the mistakes I made, and I forgive you. I wish we could take our time again, I would do a lot differently mum. I’m sorry for your difficult times and that even towards the end of your life you weren’t granted the peace you so deserved. I hope at least you felt less lonely and I hope you know how much I truly loved and cared for you, even if I often didn’t show it or get things right. I will love you and miss you always, my beautiful fiercely strong angel, mum, Yvonne xxxx